Meet Joe Average. He has been there since the dawn of time. Somewhere in the middle. The everyman. Like it not, about half the males are actually worse than Joe Average. And about half are better. Poor Joe Average, no-one really notices him. In the Middle Ages, while he was sweeping the floor, the ladies were talking of heroes. Like Lancelot. Hoping that a knight in shining armour would sweep them off their feet. Present day, not much has changed. Sure, there’s an app for almost everything. Promising the world. Including those from not-so-secret societies of pickup artists and players, all promising Joe Average that if he just rolls the dice and gets his game on, he too will be able to lance. A lot. So, somehow, Joe Average has got a girlfriend. Whether through luck, pity, or something else. The good news is, on average, something has to work. ...

Hollywood has increasingly of late, been under fire for its casting choices. Not necessarily the actors per se, but rather how the actor relates to the source material of the character in question. Particularly with respect to race and ethnicity. With this has come claims of Hollywood whitewashing characters. Taking the source material, and then converting it into the idealised and westernised archetypical characters of white males and females. So it’s not purely a case of apparent miscasting. Such as Jack Black in King Kong (2005). Or Matthew Perry as Friends character Chandler Bing in any and every other role. Or Michael Cera always playing awkward male tween. Just look at their acting range. Recent examples, include that of director Cameron Crowe issuing an apology over the casting choice of Emma Stone as Captain Allison Ng in the romantic comedy Aloha (2015). Notwithstanding the movie’s less than glowing reviews, that ...

Scientists and the Queensland Department of Agriculture and Fisheries are currently concerned that the climbing perch could soon be making its way onto the Australian mainland. The climbing perch, Anabas testudineus, is a freshwater fish native to Southeast Asia. Yet over roughly the past four decades, it has spread through to Indonesia and into Papua New Guinea. It has already been found in two islands in Australian territory of the Torres Strait. The first observations of this, occurred a decade ago back in 2005. Dr Nathan Waltham, a scientist from James Cook University, is concerned that if the climbing perch is not managed in the Torres Strait, it’s likely the noxious fish could continue its journey southwards to Australia. “We’ve only found them on Boigu and Saibai islands, so these are the islands that are closest to Papua New Guinea,” Dr Waltham said. What is remarkable about the climbing perch, ...

How to manspread: Take one man, two seats on public transport, and apply the man by liberally spreading him over the two seats instead of one. And that’s how manspreading – or #manspreading – is done. Classics of the manspreading recipe include: the man sitting as normal, but spreading both of his legs wide open; alternatively, the man may sit with his legs crossed either normally or diagonally spread across the seats. Either take next to no preparation time. Their costs could vary, however. In the USA, New York’s Metropolitan Transit Authority (MTA) even created its own subway etiquette campaign, including a poster saying “Dude… Stop the Spread, Please” in an effort to combat the spread of man. Or at least the manspreading. The MTA also has its rules of conduct prohibiting passengers occupying more than one seat if it interferes “with the operation of the Authority’s transit system or ...

Why exactly Swiss cheese has holes has been a mystery a long time in the solving. Near a century of research has gone into finding the vexing answer. And recently, the answer finally arrived. Mice around the world rejoiced. Finally vindicated of being wrongly accused of putting the holes in Swiss cheese. Some may have even been in hiding, as kabbas in the Karni Mata Temple in India, under a rodent witness relocation program. It also debunked other, stranger, theories. Like the Swiss injecting air pockets of neutrality into the otherwise weighty cheese. Possibly with the holes then serving as safety deposit boxes for secret Swiss bank accounts. Because no-one ever suspects the cheese. Indeed, recently it has been quite an epochal time in the world of cheese. From the cheese-rolling at Cooper’s Hill, England. Which never officially happened. Nudge, nudge. Wink wink. To the solution as to why Swiss ...

Adam Goodes, as sportsman he courts greatness in AFL. Outside of sport, he’s both famous and infamous. Depending on who is asked, and about what topic. It was during the first game of the AFL’s Indigenous Round, when Adam Goodes of the Sydney Swans engaged in a war dance, or war cry, in front of Carlton Blues fans at the SCG. He had just kicked a goal, putting the Swans at 57 versus 10 for the Blues. Blues fans were none-too-impressed by Goodes’ war dance and war cry. Responding with a series of boos and jeers. Amongst other things. Some of which were taken to social media. Some of the less profanity laden tweets can be read here. Speaking after the match, Goodes said there was nothing untoward about it. Nor towards the Blues fans. That the war cry was to celebrate his Indigenous heritage, saying he was “proud to ...

Islington, London, a man was almost charged ₤223,000 for a six-pack of craft beer. What exactly was this beer crafted from, may be a reasonable question. Rumours swell that it was brewed in the fires of Mount Doom itself. Using yeast secretly collected from the very baguette which stopped the Large Hadron Collider. With malts and hops of such pedigree that saffron is thrown on the ground before them as they are loaded on an unsinkable Bismarck guarded by tactical and nuclear penguins. All to form the ultimate craft beer. Or, the man was simply overcharged by accident. The decimal point had been moved a few places. Possibly because the period was being taxed. Fortunately or otherwise, he didn’t actually have the ₤223,000 in his bank account to fund the declined purchase. “I wasn’t really paying attention but I glanced down and saw the first two numbers. “They looked fine ...

Tamponomics, one has to marvel at the ability of the word “economics” to absorb whatever is thrown at the dismal science. This time around, it’s the debate about whether GST should apply to tampons in Australia. So much so, that it has caused a minor rift between Treasurer Joe Hockey and Prime Minister Tony Abbott. Only in the land down under. At present in Australia, a 10 percent Goods and Services Tax (GST) is applied to the cost of tampons. This has been the case since the tax was first introduced. The debate that the GST should not apply to tampons is not new either. It has been there from the beginning as well. In Australia, tampons are treated as a “luxury” item making them subject to the GST, unlike certain “essential” items which are not. The current revamping of the debate occurred in a major way on Tuesday 26 ...

Animal activists made a formal complaint about shearers swearing at sheep on a NSW property. The case was subsequently dropped by agriculture officials. However, it still managed to get a mention in the Senate this Tuesday in Australia. Nationals Senator John Williams asked if the sheep had made any formal complaints about being sworn at. “Not yet Senator,” replied Fran Freeman of the Department of Agriculture. Senator Williams seemed a combination of amused and annoyed by the complaint. Suggesting that “do-gooders” were making assumptions about the sheep’s ability to understand the finer points of the English language. Notwithstanding one word: Bastard. Maybe. It is possible that aggressively yelling abuse at the sheep could spook the animals. Regardless of which profanities they may, or not, have understood. Those behind the complaint, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), also said physical abuse such as punching, stomping and killing of the ...

The following has been fictionalised to protect the innocent. Because they could be watching. It began simply enough, with a trip to the local supermarket. “I’d like to buy some cheese.” “Aisle eight,” replied the employee with characteristic indifference. It was probably the umpteenth time they’d been asked and answered it. “Thanks.” Aisle eight, replete with refrigerated sections of cheese, but not much selection of cheese. “Excuse me, I’d like to buy some cheese…” The shop assistant barely looked up, and motioned to the nearby packets of cheese. “I’m looking for cheese that’s a bit more, interesting.” As though a tyre that had been punctured, the assistant sighed and slowly began to deflate. “Have you tried the deli.” Statement, not a question. Brilliant. Now at the deli, complete with numbered ticket sorted. “I’d like to buy some cheese.” “Sure, what type?” “I’m after a cheese I can roll down a ...